I Think You’re Bonkers

RULES FOR BEING HUMAN

You will receive a body.
You may like it or hate it, but it will be yours for the entire period this time around.

You will learn lessons.
You are enrolled in a full time school called ‘Life on Planet Earth’. Every person and incident is your teacher. Every day you will have the opportunity to learn lessons. You may like the lessons or think them irrelevant or stupid.

There are no mistakes - only lessons.
Growth is a process of trial and error - in other words, a process of experimentation. The ‘failed’ experiments are as much a part of the process as the experiment that ultimately ‘works’.

A lesson is repeated until learned.
It is presented in various forms until you learn it. When you have learned it, you can then go on to the next lesson. If you are here, there are still lessons to be learned.

If you don’t learn the easy lessons, they get harder.
Discomfort is one way the Universe gets your attention.

You’ll know you’ve learned a lesson when your actions and behaviours change.
Only action can transform knowledge into wisdom.

‘There’ is no better than ‘Here’.
When your ‘there’ becomes a ‘here’, you’ll notice another ‘there’ that again looks better than ‘here’.

There is no right or wrong, but there are responsibilities and consequences.
The Universe doesn’t judge us, but it gives us continual opportunities to balance and learn.

What you make of your life is up to you.
You have the tools and resources. What you do with them is up to you. The choices are yours.

Your answers lie inside you.
Living skilfully, gracefully, and with purpose, involves developing the ability to listen and trust.

You’ll tend to forget all this.

You can remember any time you wish.

A Mother’s Night Before Christmas…

‘Twas was the night before Christmas, when all thru the abode,
only one creature was stirring, and she was cleaning the commode.
The children were finally sleeping, all snug in their beds,
while visions of Nintendo Wii and Barbie, flipped through their heads.

The dad was snoring in front of the TV,
with a half-constructed bicycle on his knee.
So only the mom heard the reindeer hooves clatter,
which made her sigh, "Now what’s the matter?"

With toilet bowl brush still clutched in her hand,
she descended the stairs, and saw the old man.
He was covered with ashes and soot, which fell with a shrug.
"Oh great," muttered the mom, "Now I have to clean the rug."

"Ho-ho-ho!" cried Santa, "I’m glad you’re awake."
"Your gift was especially difficult to make."
"Thanks, Santa, but all I want is some time alone."
"Exactly!" he chuckled, "I’ve made you a clone."

"A clone?" she asked, "What good is that?
Run along, Santa, I’ve no time for chit-chat."

The mother’s twin. Same hair, same eyes,
same double chin. "She’ll cook, she’ll dust, "
she’ll mop every mess. You’ll relax, take it easy,
watch The Young & the Restless." "Fantastic!" the mom cheered.
"My dream come true! "I’ll shop. I’ll read., I’ll sleep a whole night
through! "

From the room above, the youngest began to fret.
"Mommy?! I scared… and I ‘m wet."

The clone replied, "I’m coming, sweetheart."
"Hey," the mom smiled, "She knows her part."
The clone changed the small one, and hummed a tune,
as she bundled the child, in a blanket cocoon.

"You the best mommy ever. " I really love you."
The clone smiled and sighed, "I love you, too."
The mom frowned and said, "Sorry, Santa, no deal. "
That’s my child’s love, she’s trying to steal."

Smiling wisely Santa said, "To me it is clear, "
Only one loving mother, is needed here."

The mom kissed her child, and tucked her into bed.
"Thank you, Santa, " for clearing my head.
I sometimes forget, it won’t be very long,
when they’ll be too old, for my cradle-song."

The clock on the mantle began to chime.
Santa whispered to the clone, "It works every time."
With the clone by his side Santa said, "Goodnight.
Merry Christmas, Mom, You’ll be all right.

Seen it before somewhere but I like it. Happy Christmas anyone reading.

For Kris:

And by special request…

See you all in 2008. 

Thanks to Kris, who told me last night that the Sunday Express today had a voucher for a half price real christmas tree in focus/do it all.

So we poddled over to the local shop for a paper, got it, tore out the voucher and wandered over to Focus where we grabbed one of the last 3 trees! Not only was it half price, it was marked wrong too so the tree marked up at £24.99 scanned at the till at £17.99 and cost me £8.99.

So, we now have a lovely smelling, gorgeous Nordmann spruce sitting next to the sofa, relaxing it’s poor netted branches. Decorations on tomorrow I think, assuming I can sort out the extension reel across the room with a reasonable degreee of safety…..

Reckon we’ve broke up for Christmas now then.  

OK, so we did dec’s today…

We went off to the cinema this afternoon to see Stardust. Effects were good, Michelle Pfeiffer particularly good as the nasty Lamia. An all round fun film even if Mimi did end up on my lap for some of it, hiding in my shoulder and demanding sweets!

Oh and Robert DeNiro’s cross dressing pirate captain is well worth a special mention - hysterical! 

Online Advent Calendar

A different game every day until Christmas. The kids are loving it!

For Sprout lovers. 

And for Sprout haters. 

Actually they’re just fun whether you love or hate sprouts.  

I’m sure we’ve done some.

Dino still races on intuitively with anything mathsy or with a logic aspect and still hates and struggles with all things to do with language. Mimi is belting through study dog and devouring language like I did at her age. He’s frustrated at her ease with it and I can’t connect with him on this.

I love reading, I love language, I love words. I’m not intuitive or logical with maths. I can do it and I can get some satisfaction from accomplishing what is needed, but I don’t really understand or enjoy it.

I just don’t *get* the way his head works and we’re fighting over it more than I want.

I want him to be able to read, to read confidently. If he then chooses not to read for pleasure then that’s fine, but I think he needs the skill. We live in a society driven by the written word and our decoding of it. We need to read and write (to an extent) in order to function and achieve our personal goals. I know there are people out there that dispute that. I know there is software for reading text on the computer, I know that you can type rather than use a pen. I do the latter. I hardly put an actual pen to actual paper these days. But I can and because I can I can understand the keyboard and the way writing works.

So in the meantime he’s slowly and painfully fighting his way through various texts as I try and find out how to spark this for him.

Actually, I think this is a good thing, too hard to read and I give up to be honest. Short words please….